How to deal with a Possessive Friend

You come across thousands of people in your lifetime and stepping up on the thread that distinct one from being a stranger to an acquaintance, a beautiful bonding called friendship somehow seeds in. Believing in the strength of your friendship, you come closer to the person with each passing day until both of you become soulmates. A best friend becomes your second family who you look upon not only during times of trouble but also when you’re happy and cannot resist from sharing your ecstasy. The realization that you have actually let
someone be a part of yourself doesn’t dawn on you all of a sudden but it is like a gradual promotion of someone’s position from ‘nothing’ to ‘everything’ in your school of life.

Possesive Friend Relationships

However, sometimes this very base of friendship often faces challenging and tough times amongst which handling of over-possessiveness is the most difficult task. Feeling offended when you talk to other people, reacting if you hang out with other friends, bursting into an emotional outcry if your phone is busy, in short, taking full control of your life – does this sound familiar? If yes, then you are friends with someone who is extremely possessive about
you. While initially it may seem you have the most caring friend in the world, but then gradually it causes you irritation, disgust and outrage.

So, the puzzle remains over the confusion on whether to dessert your friend or to maintain a distance. This puts the best of us in confusion because most of us do care and are sensitive about the people in our lives. To deal with cases as such, here go few tips that may draw necessary results.

Figure out the problem

Do not be impulsive when it comes to the handling of relationships; any relationship at that. When you start realizing your friend is showing obsessive symptoms, its time you talk to them instead of ignoring them at once. You must distinguish between your friends’
behaviors with that of a problem they might be going through. It is possible that they have been a victim of a situation and they seek your attention to fill the void. Whatever it is, talking things out is the first step to resolving anything. Understanding their perspective is important but it is also very necessary to make your friend believe the practical aspects. Convince them on how their behavior could not only prove harmful for both of your friendship but also to their lifestyle in future.

Do not fight

It is quite hard to maintain your calm in such situations. But ‘patience is virtue’. Isn’t it? Most people lose their mind which results in a sour relationship. Everytime you are questioned about your moves, do not quarrel or insult your friend. Instead, explain how their over-interference is not a healthy sign and could possibly be the reason why you’re drifting apart. In some cases, these people tend to become verbally violent and start abusing to vent out their frustration. The best way is to simply ignore their and cut off your connections after placing out your reasons. This point might contradict with the suggestion of talking things out but then situations demand a totally different action. And in cases as the latter, it is best to let go.

This is a world which is always on a competing mode and slowly we all are falling prey to feelings of inferiority and low-esteem. So it is natural that some people act the way they do. What we need to do is be empathetic rather than being outright ignorant. When we befriend
someone, the purpose does not remain enclosed to fun and mere enjoyment. With a new relationship, we own few responsibilities of not hurting them, of understanding them and of being with them even when they give you reasons not to. That explains why you should first
counsel them instead of leaving them to figure out what really happened. But when the damage is beyond repair, it is advisable to walk out of the friendship with your reasons transparent to all.


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