Imagine you going somewhere alone, in the middle of the night, you hear footsteps. You turn around, only to find nobody, you continue on your path without worrying. You saw nobody, so now you think you are safe. But then, out of nowhere a huge man whom you wouldn’t even give a second look, comes in front of you and tries to manhandle you, or even worse, molest you. You can shout, you can cry, but nobody is coming to save you! How do you feel? Pathetic, scared, grossed out?
Now, try putting a child in the same scenario. Sends shivers down the spine, right? Of course it would, a child so small, he/she may not even know the word molest. A child so secure in his/her own world, he/she might not even know what is happening to them. You don’t want a child to go through this hell. Nobody does. The reason I gave you this trip is because whether you like it or not, shit happens. Pedophiles, adults who are sexually attracted to prepubescent kids, exist and are all around us. We live in an age where good and bad co-exist and we just cannot take things for granted. We need to be alert and protect the kids from all sorts of evils–
Talk about it – No matter how hard it is, you need to take your sharam ka parda off and be very open to your kid. You want the best for the kid, so get up and work on it. Tell the kid that they’re not supposed to get friendly with everybody. You’re doing this only till they are unable to think for themselves. They will see the world through your eyes so you better be careful about what you tell them.
The difference between good touch and bad touch – Kindly do not use the grown-up’s language and throw terms like ‘molest’ and ‘physical abuse’ in the child’s face. Tell them about good touch and bad touch, tell them to come to you whenever somebody makes them uncomfortable. The kid’s first best friend is always his/her parents, make sure you are at that place with your kid.
Name the private parts for them – The kid should always know the names of his/her private parts, this could help you in checking if they’ve had a problem with their private part or if somebody forcefully touched them, down there!
Never shush a kid when he/she wants to talk to you– Not all kids are born extroverts, sometimes it takes immense courage for a kid to come up to you and pour their heart out. Lend them an ear, be polite and encouraging. Believe me, you want to know what the kid is going to tell you.
Do not always trust your friends and family – It is not a matter of luck or chance, it is not necessary that an alien would have to come to earth to molest your child, people you know, often do not look at your child with the same affection as you do. Be very careful with the people you trust to send your child alone with. It can be anybody, somebody within the house or outside the house, who could do something wrong.
Never neglect the kid – Neglected kids are more capable of going to some other adult for parental love, you are yourself putting your kid in grave danger. Also, a neglected kid would never come and disclose if something wrong happened with him/her. There is a very thin line between being busy with work and neglecting your kid. Your kid is your responsibility, own up to it!
Kids are very sensitive, everything you do or say affects them in a way that you can’t even fathom. The best way to communicate with kids is to listen to them carefully and make them aware of the fact that you’re always there for them. I am sure you don’t want to be the last one to know what happened with your kid when he/she was really young.