Relationships play a major role in each one of us lives. Life is meaningful by the presence of relationships. Every relationship gives a new perception to see towards the life. Relationships make the life full of excitement, interest and motivation to live it to the fullest. Relationships in simple words are the transactions of the thoughts, feelings and emotions among different people. We possess different relationships into a single life. Each relationship expects us to play a different role every time. I feel a relationship makes us realize the different shades of our own nature and personality. We get to know not only the other person by the means of a relationship but we also get to know about our hidden potentialities and capabilities.
There are so many relationships such as the relationship of a mother-child, husband-wife, brother-sister, children-parent, teacher-student and so many others. Every relationship leaves a deep impact in our lives. As far as the relationship goes smoothly life seems easy and enjoyable but even a single glance of turbulence in the relationship disturbs the life drastically. Life seems like a burden or a big battle if any of our relationships gets disturbed. Since we all are very much attached and involved with our relationships that is why any misunderstanding, mistake or disturbance directly disturbs our peace of mind and hence affects our working, thinking and make us restless.Relationships are like plants that need water of love and humility, air of positivity and light of patience and tolerance. Negative factors being provided to the relationship such as force, authority, arguments, anger and ego can surely spoil your relationships. They should be taken with lots of solicitude and reverence. They are truly like plants when not given appropriate water, air and light would become dull and dead at last.
Let’s ponder over little things that you surely can apply to any of your relationship and make it new and alive:
• DO NOT TRY TO CONTROL ANY PERSON: never try to control any person. This is a fact of life that you cannot ever control anybody and cannot force anybody to work according to your wish especially in a relationship. A relationship is transaction of feelings and emotions not of force and commands. We must be clear with the fact that we cannot control any person. The moment we try to control anybody and expects that another person acts according to our wish only then the relationships turns into a form of a burden in which only one party becomes dominating. Every person has his/her own wish and possesses a particular state of mind. There should a proper emotional space and freedom given to every person involved in the relationship. The moment you stop controlling another person your relationship would become free from all the prejudices and burdensome feelings.
•SHARING OF THOUGHTS: share your thoughts in your relationship. Your thoughts project your personality, your desires and your feelings. Sharing of thoughts would make you a clear person in that relationship. We usually tend to feel that another person would understand our feelings at his/her own. We do not feel to open up our mouths to speak up about our feelings. We stay quiet for so long and stop sharing the thoughts and feelings asserting that another person would automatically understand your thoughts. That’s not a right approach. Be clear with what you want to say. While sharing your thought do remember that another person has also so much to say. So, also listen to another person with keen ears. Break your silence and start sharing your feelings.
•BE SWEET WITH YOUR LANGUAGE: Always use a sweet way and decent language while interacting in any relationship. Sweetness in language does wonders. Everybody likes to be treated in a decent way. Use of foul language shows that you are at a loss of good language. Always be good and compassionate with your way of talking. Even if you want to rectify someone or wants to share some problem with other, they would surely like to discuss it with you if you give them respect and treat them well in that very initiative. Never use indecent words in your relationships. Tell the truth (how much absurd it may be) with utmost compassion and good language it’s confirmed that another would not feel bad in fact he/she would think over it.
•ACCEPT YOUR MISTAKES: If you have done something wrong in your relationship or you have hurt another person in the relationship always tries to commit that mistake that very moment. Add the word ‘SORRY’ in your relationships. Saying sorry would not make you smaller and less worth rather it would make you a person of great value. And if you feel that somebody has done something wrong to you then discuss that thing with that person with a lot of patience. To say it very calmly that you did not like that act of that person and make a request to the person not to repeat the mistake again.
• LET GO: There are many things happening in our lives that would only raise fights and arguments. This is a fact that everybody is doing the best from his/her side. Nobody wants to be scolded and does not do any wrong by wish. But even then something goes wrong into your relationship and you feel that it would create more problems, then try to let go that incident. Nothing is permanent in this life. Every condition is changing every moment in fact the human nature is also changing every moment. So let go the things instead of creating any scene over those situations. Time heals many things. So do not spoil your relationship for few temporary situations.
•DO WHAT YOU SAY: sometimes few persons speak a lot but do very little. It may be related to their own relationships as well. If you have the habit of speaking more and doing less in that regard, then rectify your habit then onwards. Try to do what you say or commit in your relationships. If you just say on air then no doubt that another person would start doubting you or may start taking your words and you for granted. Try to fulfill your words may it be a promise to come early at home or to satisfy your duties in the relationship.
•PUT YOURSELF IN ANOTHER’S SHOE: try to understand the situation from other’s perspectives. Sometime few situations come into our lives when we think that another person has taken wrong decision or have done wrong. But it is very necessary to understand the conditions of that other person into which he/she took that step. Try to put yourself into another’s place and then think over the decision. Maybe then you would realize that you also would have taken the same step or maybe you could understand the situation from another’s point of view.
•AVIOD ARGUMENTS AND EGOISM: As I have already mentioned that instead of fighting or arguments try to understand the situation in a broad way. Arguments would always give rise to bitterness into relationships. Try to solve the things with poise, patience and open discussion. Try to discuss the situation or the problem. Open discussion is a solution to many problems. Do not try to push down other’s thoughts and ideas and never expects only others to obey your words without any questions. This attitude would make your relationship worse. Arguments would only obstruct your way with ego. Ego has never helped anyone and it has always spoiled relationships. So avoid arguments and egoism. Lead your relationships with patience and open mindedness.
•MAKE REALIZE HOW MUCH IMPORTANT THE RELATIONSHIP FOR YOU: relationship has been always important for you to live the life. Relationships provide you emotional security, motivation, suggestions, social acceptance, teaches you how to live and makes you a social being etc. Every relationship is giving you something different. So, try to realize the worth of that relationship and the worth of the persons being involved in that relationship. Assure the persons involved that they are important for you. The relationship is alive due to their love and contributions. Give them and the relationship your regards and show your gratitude towards them. You can make them special by giving small and lovely token of gratitude. You can do this all by many small yet significant things such as by sharing gifts, by remembering the important dates (birthday, anniversary, achievements etc.).
•EXPECT LESS: though your relationships are important for you but still they can only support you. All the efforts would be made by you only. Practically do not rely too much on your relationships for your own things. Be confident and independent in your relationships. Try to do your works on your own yet maintain the worth of your relationships. - Do not over- expect that your relationships would do everything for you. This is a fact of this universe. Do not become too much dependent on any person in your relationships and maintains the freedom of expression and the personal space of everyone involved in the relationship.
•IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP HEALTHY OR A BURDEN: there should be a regular check over the contributions of your relationships. Sometimes we do not get so much of the contributions, motivation and compassion from a few of our relationships. In such situations we tend to drag that relationship till the last breath. That is not good at least in my opinion. One should see that whether the relationship has crossed all the limits and has it taken the form of a burden? If it is a situation where it is really tough for you to continue the relationship after making every best for its survival then there is a moment to analyze that relationship once again for the good to all people involved into that relationship.
It is important to do every best possible thing for your relationships because there are the other human beings you are dealing with. The relationship should be continued with lots of affection and purity of thoughts and actions.
There are so many relationships such as the relationship of a mother-child, husband-wife, brother-sister, children-parent, teacher-student and so many others. Every relationship leaves a deep impact in our lives. As far as the relationship goes smoothly life seems easy and enjoyable but even a single glance of turbulence in the relationship disturbs the life drastically. Life seems like a burden or a big battle if any of our relationships gets disturbed. Since we all are very much attached and involved with our relationships that is why any misunderstanding, mistake or disturbance directly disturbs our peace of mind and hence affects our working, thinking and make us restless.Relationships are like plants that need water of love and humility, air of positivity and light of patience and tolerance. Negative factors being provided to the relationship such as force, authority, arguments, anger and ego can surely spoil your relationships. They should be taken with lots of solicitude and reverence. They are truly like plants when not given appropriate water, air and light would become dull and dead at last.
Let’s ponder over little things that you surely can apply to any of your relationship and make it new and alive:
• DO NOT TRY TO CONTROL ANY PERSON: never try to control any person. This is a fact of life that you cannot ever control anybody and cannot force anybody to work according to your wish especially in a relationship. A relationship is transaction of feelings and emotions not of force and commands. We must be clear with the fact that we cannot control any person. The moment we try to control anybody and expects that another person acts according to our wish only then the relationships turns into a form of a burden in which only one party becomes dominating. Every person has his/her own wish and possesses a particular state of mind. There should a proper emotional space and freedom given to every person involved in the relationship. The moment you stop controlling another person your relationship would become free from all the prejudices and burdensome feelings.
•SHARING OF THOUGHTS: share your thoughts in your relationship. Your thoughts project your personality, your desires and your feelings. Sharing of thoughts would make you a clear person in that relationship. We usually tend to feel that another person would understand our feelings at his/her own. We do not feel to open up our mouths to speak up about our feelings. We stay quiet for so long and stop sharing the thoughts and feelings asserting that another person would automatically understand your thoughts. That’s not a right approach. Be clear with what you want to say. While sharing your thought do remember that another person has also so much to say. So, also listen to another person with keen ears. Break your silence and start sharing your feelings.
•BE SWEET WITH YOUR LANGUAGE: Always use a sweet way and decent language while interacting in any relationship. Sweetness in language does wonders. Everybody likes to be treated in a decent way. Use of foul language shows that you are at a loss of good language. Always be good and compassionate with your way of talking. Even if you want to rectify someone or wants to share some problem with other, they would surely like to discuss it with you if you give them respect and treat them well in that very initiative. Never use indecent words in your relationships. Tell the truth (how much absurd it may be) with utmost compassion and good language it’s confirmed that another would not feel bad in fact he/she would think over it.
•ACCEPT YOUR MISTAKES: If you have done something wrong in your relationship or you have hurt another person in the relationship always tries to commit that mistake that very moment. Add the word ‘SORRY’ in your relationships. Saying sorry would not make you smaller and less worth rather it would make you a person of great value. And if you feel that somebody has done something wrong to you then discuss that thing with that person with a lot of patience. To say it very calmly that you did not like that act of that person and make a request to the person not to repeat the mistake again.
• LET GO: There are many things happening in our lives that would only raise fights and arguments. This is a fact that everybody is doing the best from his/her side. Nobody wants to be scolded and does not do any wrong by wish. But even then something goes wrong into your relationship and you feel that it would create more problems, then try to let go that incident. Nothing is permanent in this life. Every condition is changing every moment in fact the human nature is also changing every moment. So let go the things instead of creating any scene over those situations. Time heals many things. So do not spoil your relationship for few temporary situations.
•DO WHAT YOU SAY: sometimes few persons speak a lot but do very little. It may be related to their own relationships as well. If you have the habit of speaking more and doing less in that regard, then rectify your habit then onwards. Try to do what you say or commit in your relationships. If you just say on air then no doubt that another person would start doubting you or may start taking your words and you for granted. Try to fulfill your words may it be a promise to come early at home or to satisfy your duties in the relationship.
•PUT YOURSELF IN ANOTHER’S SHOE: try to understand the situation from other’s perspectives. Sometime few situations come into our lives when we think that another person has taken wrong decision or have done wrong. But it is very necessary to understand the conditions of that other person into which he/she took that step. Try to put yourself into another’s place and then think over the decision. Maybe then you would realize that you also would have taken the same step or maybe you could understand the situation from another’s point of view.
•AVIOD ARGUMENTS AND EGOISM: As I have already mentioned that instead of fighting or arguments try to understand the situation in a broad way. Arguments would always give rise to bitterness into relationships. Try to solve the things with poise, patience and open discussion. Try to discuss the situation or the problem. Open discussion is a solution to many problems. Do not try to push down other’s thoughts and ideas and never expects only others to obey your words without any questions. This attitude would make your relationship worse. Arguments would only obstruct your way with ego. Ego has never helped anyone and it has always spoiled relationships. So avoid arguments and egoism. Lead your relationships with patience and open mindedness.
•MAKE REALIZE HOW MUCH IMPORTANT THE RELATIONSHIP FOR YOU: relationship has been always important for you to live the life. Relationships provide you emotional security, motivation, suggestions, social acceptance, teaches you how to live and makes you a social being etc. Every relationship is giving you something different. So, try to realize the worth of that relationship and the worth of the persons being involved in that relationship. Assure the persons involved that they are important for you. The relationship is alive due to their love and contributions. Give them and the relationship your regards and show your gratitude towards them. You can make them special by giving small and lovely token of gratitude. You can do this all by many small yet significant things such as by sharing gifts, by remembering the important dates (birthday, anniversary, achievements etc.).
•EXPECT LESS: though your relationships are important for you but still they can only support you. All the efforts would be made by you only. Practically do not rely too much on your relationships for your own things. Be confident and independent in your relationships. Try to do your works on your own yet maintain the worth of your relationships. - Do not over- expect that your relationships would do everything for you. This is a fact of this universe. Do not become too much dependent on any person in your relationships and maintains the freedom of expression and the personal space of everyone involved in the relationship.
•IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP HEALTHY OR A BURDEN: there should be a regular check over the contributions of your relationships. Sometimes we do not get so much of the contributions, motivation and compassion from a few of our relationships. In such situations we tend to drag that relationship till the last breath. That is not good at least in my opinion. One should see that whether the relationship has crossed all the limits and has it taken the form of a burden? If it is a situation where it is really tough for you to continue the relationship after making every best for its survival then there is a moment to analyze that relationship once again for the good to all people involved into that relationship.
It is important to do every best possible thing for your relationships because there are the other human beings you are dealing with. The relationship should be continued with lots of affection and purity of thoughts and actions.