Depression is an inflicting state of mind which does not only eat the mind of a person but also his/ her relationship. There is a high chances if one of the partner is into depression then it is somewhere down the line either affecting your relationship to the point of break-up or making even you depressed.
A healthy relationship is where both the partners are happy and can voice their opinions, if you feel anywhere trapped in between saying ‘how you feel’ to ‘how you don’t want to,’ then there are high chances of you being in a depressed relationship.
Depressing relationships have clear signs and symptoms and you can help yourself from being in one. Remember, depressing relationships are a major cause behind domestic violence and men and women both are victims of it:
1. Temper Outburst : A depressing relationship will always leave you in tears due to the outburst at you without you being at fault. A normal temper and a ‘no-reason’ outburst are very different and can be felt at your end. If you feel your partner gets angry over anything that could have been talked out politely or could have been understood on its own, there, that’s the first clue to a depressing relationship.
2. Playing The Victim : A depressed person always tries and accumulate sympathy towards him/ her most of the time. If your partner is depressed then you’ll find him/ her playing the victim at most of the times. Even when it is their fault, you are the one saying sorry and feeling low to even express your actual opinions over the matter.
3. Control Freak And Obsessive: A little jealousy and insecurity have its presence in every relationship. There is no relationship where the partner does not feel a bit insecure or jealous may be of your friends or your exs’. But feeling insecure and jealous to the point where your partner becomes obsessive towards you and controls you for ‘where-to-go,’ ‘whom-to-meet’ and ‘what-to-wear’; calls for a rescue from the depressing relationship.
4. Lack of Trust, Even for Family : If your relationship crisis has reached to the peak where your partner does not even trust your family and loved ones, then it’s a sure-shot sign that you are trapped in a depressing relationship. If the condition has knocked the door to the defending of family, friend and loved ones at your end and continuous questioning from your partner’s end then take time to think about the relationship.
5. Blaming And Lying : If you are in a depressing relationship, then you feel being blamed for almost all mistakes and you are declined towards lying rather than explaining yourself to your partner. If you find lying soothing than telling the truth or voicing your opinions, then you are in a depressed relationship.
If you have caught yourself nodding to most of the issues raised above then your relationship needs attention and more than that it needs talking. It is very important to talk about it rather than leaving your partner who might be depressed in his/ her condition. Depression is not inevitable neither it is incurable. It is just a state of mind which requires attention, love and support and there are chances that your partner has been trying to gain all of that through his/ her ways and which have been depicted in a wrong way as being short-tempered, control or obsessive freak.
Who Needs Help, You or Your Partner:
- If since the start of the relationship or even when you two were friends (if), your partner/ friend had been in sorts of above mentioned issues, then it is time when you need help so that you does not get trapped in a non-healthy relationship.
- If your partner has suddenly started showing any of the above signs or all then it is when your partner needs your help. May be some business or relationship worry is eating him/ her up.
Work Towards Making It A Healthy Relationship Again:
Relationships can quickly break if one of the partners finds themselves in any of the above situations but there are ways in which it can be worked upon together and lead to be a healthy relationship. Follow the steps below towards making your relationship sober and happy again:
Communicate : Talking about the problem is the first and most effective way to beat the problem.
Don’t Judge : If you are being yelled at or made to cry, then it is wrong to just accept and judge that your partner is like this only. Don’t rush yourself to judge or reach to any conclusion.
Find the Triggering Points : Sometimes all that is worrying your partner and leading him to depression is money issues; it can be anything else too, may be some past experiences. It is important to find the cause behind your partner being a depressed person.
It is necessary that you be of help and not accept or reject the relationship in a haste, after all your partner is someone you love and someone you want to be with. Work on it together!