5 Things Parents Should Avoid Speaking To Their Child

[Woman]

A growing child is very innocent and kind of exploring everything around, in such a tender age the child has immense tendencies to learn and experience the things at his/her own. A good parenting in this phase is very beneficial and also required if the parents understand and determine the needful factors of parenting then the child is assured to possess a confident and an impressive personality. Communication/interaction plays a very vital role during the parenting of toddlers since the child is too small to understand the things around he/she tends to asks numerous of questions and have many doubts. The child wants to know about everything and even tries to get engage in many activities that he sees his parents doing. However the educated parents are very well aware about giving motivation and help to their toddlers while they are learning, but still there are many times when parents ignorantly lose their calm and tend to communicate in a manner in which they should never do it. Following are the things which the parents should always avoid saying to their growing child:

1.NO, don’t do that/ touch that: a toddler is always excited to know and to touch the things in front of him/her because this is the only way available to him to experience the things and in such a case if the child is being constantly interrupted or stopped by the parents, he/she would certainly develop a fear of not doing anything at his own. The child will not be able to develop the confidence of handling the things at own, a growing child always require constant motivation, guidance and help. Help the child wherever it is needed and set him free.

2.You are so stupid: speaking such negative words will certainly leave a negative impact on the child’s mind. This is the time for him/her to develop a sense of confidence in the self and moreover when the child will explore the better he would learn it. It is also true that every child has different capacity and way to understand the things. Declaring the child as dumb or stupid would definitely shatter his confidence to learn the new things.

3.Don’t ask questions: if a child doesn’t ask then who will? A toddler’s parenting is surely crucial because the parents not only have to look after the physical aspect but also have to cater to the mental aspect of their child. The child in such age is very curious he/she asks numerous of questions and that is the point for the parents where they should not give up. Serving the child with right answers of his questions will help him to raise the level of IQ.

4.Will lock you in the bathroom: deterring the child with punishment tact such as locking in the bathroom or slapping or abusing in the public will have a very bad impact on the child’s mind. The child’s personality will certainly become gloomy, fearful and pessimistic such tact will not help the child to maintain discipline but would severely spoil the harmony of his mind and intellect.

5.You don’t know anything: yes a toddler certainly doesn’t know what all you know, that is why he/she tends to ask you about something. And shutting up his mouth by saying that you don’t know anything will keep him ignorant for all his life. The wish to ask, learn and know will be ceased and the child will might lose his interest in everything. And one day you would have to scold your child once again that he/she doesn’t listen to you. So it is better to satisfy his urge to know, with the right knowledge rather than ceasing his wish to know.

A toddler must be given a whole lot of compassion, care, attention and motivation then only your parenting would pay off.

 

[shinning]

I guess when the child turns 3 the calm and patience of the parents is gone for a toss.
Anger,agitation,stress is than started to pour on the kids and unknowingly and unwanted-ly the parents shout and behave wrongly with the kids.
Whats the cure of this.
Parents know a lot of Do's and Dont's but how to apply them is a big question.

 

[Kritiquesays]

I would like to add some more points here.

SHAMING the child in public is a very atrocious act. It rips the child of his self-confidence and makes him feel very ashamed of whatever he has done. This rule goes during the presence of other family members and friends too.

Telling the child: "It is all in your head!" is a harmful way of saying that what the child is thinking is not acceptable.

Using SARCASM with the child makes him confused and therefore should be avoided.

 

[Shreyy]

A child grows up to imitate what parents do in everyday life, somehow subconsciously though. It is needless to say that parents or infact, any elder at that, is in a responsible position from the time a child is born until the age they learn to make distinctions between what is acceptable to them and what's not. The problem with some people is that they think as parents they are always right in the way they handle their children. However, even parenting needs experts' advice. While I cannot back up my claims on the basis of any medical practice but here are some tips I could give based on what I've been observing around.

1. Never gossip - Be it the neighbor or someone from the extension of your family, he/she might have annoyed you and all you want to do is vent out your frustration but never let your child know about your personal issues with the concerned 'villain' of your life. Even if you find it spicy to talk about a woman neighbor who was last seen with another man, try to remind yourself of your literacy level and prevent yourself from engaging in such petty activities. The person might be anonymous to your child but it is not about the person at all. Gossiping is an useless activity in the first place.
   
   
2. Never Insult - Insulting your child is equivalent to making him feel small and incapable. You may think you're snubbing or pointing out his mistakes so that he/she works on that later but it doesn't work this way. Children pick up habits too fast and they will either develop more obstinacy with time or imitate your behavior while dealing with others.
   
   
3. Never brag - Bragging is a synonym of showing off. Basic human nature says we are too keen on speaking about our achievements in front of people rather than lending our ears to what they might have to say. This is a common trait in people belonging to every class and it is a practice which flows through generations. So, never brag about your child's achievements in front of them. It is okay to motivate and encourage them once in a while though.
   
   
4. Never compare - This is the meanest way of treating your child. Telling them how their sibling or friend is better than them will only be a low to their self-respect. You cannot expect people to be like someone else, it is best to motivate them to adopt the better things in life. But comparing with others is a poor measurement of ensuring so.
   
   
5. Never threaten - Warnings are okay but it has been found that threats create anti-behavioral problems in children.